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Thursday, October 24, 2019


Where will it take us?


Vijay Simha peeps into the instincts that make the family a life-shaping force in India!
TSI | Issue Dated: May 13, 2007
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Where will it take us? First impressions last, they say. The sight of an infant, just born, is to be instantly purged. For the baby, the feel of family is immortality. Itís the beginning of all that there can be. No better alternative has yet been discovered to this start to life. Like elsewhere, the family defines the quality and character of India. When a superstar begins to shed his control for endless rounds of propitiation of the Almighty, for a family he can be proud of, itís time to take a look. When one of the countryís most important politicians begins to assign copyright to family, of some the decisive acts in history, itís time to assess.

In real terms, family is a mere accident. None of us has a choice of family to be born into. Yet, the deed done, we probably wouldnít want to be anywhere else. So, why is family getting so much on our nerves? Is it that tolerance for mistakes is lessening? Or, are rules getting rigid. American psychotherapist Virginia Satir once said that feelings of worth can only flourish in an atmosphere found in a nurturing family. Basically, this means that a healthy and loving family should find everything forgivable. They shouldnít keep score.

That is not entirely true in modern India. Murders are morphing into massacres, with more than five family members killed in one night no longer macabre enough. Business empires are riven over inheritance. Pursuit of power, as always, is still all in the family. So, how are we shaped? What happens to self-doubt? What character does the family mould of people likely to make monumental decisions? How do we handle grief and joy? The Sunday Indian wondered whether the father, mother, wife, husband are all there. Is the family merely a school of duties, as it was once described? Or does love still reign? The first of the TSI family specials probes these questions as it looks at the future of the family, and where it could take us. Hop on . . .
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Issue Dated: Feb 5, 2017