Celebrating Indianness

You know, as an Indian, it's been my first instinct to take the important and obvious things for granted. Be it the national holidays that are meant to awaken the patriot in me or my religion and its unreasonable imposing. Funnily, ever since I flew out of my country, these thoughts don't seem to abandon me. Don't get me wrong, I perfectly feel that I belong here, much like I did back home. But the fact that I am still calling India home, even though I have been residing in the States for over a year now, goes to only prove that 'home is where my heart is'. Coming back to the point, I feel like a fool who has come to value her estranged lover only after losing him. Leaving my melodrama aside, I feel that small incidents and anecdotes stir the passive Indian in me. Recently, I attended a Republic Day celebration(yes! they actually celebrate every important Indian event here)by a group of Indians who exhibited their love for their motherland through traditional song, dance and dinner. The point is not that they did it, it is that they didn't have to do it. But they still took out time and money out of their lives and expressed gratitude.

At first, I almost giggled and mocked it but as the evening progressed, I realized that the 400-odd American-Indians sitting in that room probably felt a little closer to 'home'. And weirdly, so did I. They wore ethnic clothes and fine jewellery and they danced to some foot thumping Bollywood music while I, dressed totally American and looking embarrassed , felt kind of queasy. A question kept bothering me through all this-a slow and a mild itch at best-was what was this crazy need to look Indian? I could very well suppress this annoying question but the more I ignored, the more it taunted me. All my life, I have subconsciously tried to avoid looking Indian (as if it was uncool!) and here I was in a room full of people , mostly Americans by nationality who felt this comfort wearing and looking Indian. It’s an absurd lie that clothes make you feel closer to your country and it’s an absolute truth that no matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t beat the Indian out of me by wearing stockings and skirts. It's not the clothes or songs or the food, it's the feeling that matters.


And it's only through some sappy patriotic movie or mid way through the national anthem , that I witness that feeling comes to life. One thing that I admire about these Indians living overseas is that after they find people of their own kind-and the criteria is not based on religion or community, but that one's an Indian-they leave no stone unturned to celebrate it. May be in a foreign land, there is a constant need to remember that one's an Indian or it's simply reliving the memories that takes them 'home' or it is the desire to hold on to and celebrate their Indianness!

Whatever it is, I thought it was worth mentioning and sharing with everyone on the other side of the globe!